


The Need for a Long Bath

by EuterpesChild



Series: Christmas Ficlets 2016 [4]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Bathtubs, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 17:10:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8999557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EuterpesChild/pseuds/EuterpesChild
Summary: Sherlock is...very particular about his bathtubs.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the converter of us all, Rebs quietlyprim. Of course, Rebs doesn't have an AO3 account, but I wish xer a very happy Yuletide all the same.

“MRS. HUDSON!”

The familiar shout came from the hallway adjoining the living room. John fancied the force of it rattled his teacup in his saucer.

Mrs. Hudson came running up the stairs in a fluster, and met Sherlock just as he exited his bathroom with nothing but a towel wrapped about his waist. John quickly averted his gaze.

“What is it? What’s happened?”

“We need a new bathtub,” Sherlock pronounced. Mrs. Hudson looked flummoxed.

“A new bathtub? What’ve you done with this one then?”

“I haven’t ‘done’ anything with this tub,” Sherlock replied with annoyance. “It’s too small. We need a six-footer.”

“What d’you need a six-foot tub for, then?” Mrs. Hudson answered, nonplussed. “You’ve gotten on just fine with this one for the last few years.”

“Never mind why, just do it!” And with that, Sherlock inelegantly pushed Mrs. Hudson back towards the staircase and swanned back into the lav.

 

For the next week, Sherlock continued to exit his bathroom less than fully clothed and ranting about the size of the tub. John was becoming increasingly frustrated with his boyfriend’s behavior, especially since Sherlock insisted on appearing in only a towel whenever John was going to work or with a client or attempting to have a conversation with Mrs. Hudson about the lino. Finally, he’d had enough.

“What is so bloody important about having a longer tub?” John snapped on day eight, and both Sherlock and Mrs. Hudson turned to look at him in surprise. “You,” he pointed at Sherlock, “are being an absolute child about this, and you,” here he turned to their landlady, “what would we have to do to shut him up?”

After a small pause, the other two occupants of the room began speaking at once. John held up a hand to stop them, then pointed at Mrs. Hudson to indicate she should go first.

“Well, dear, I suppose we would have to get workmen in to take out the current one, then I think we could fit the other one in without remodeling, but- “

John cut her off. “Do it. And you-” He pointed at Sherlock. “Shut up and put some clothes on.” Sherlock opened his mouth to protest, then, seeing John’s stormy expression, shut it again and went off to his room to change. Mrs. Hudson scurried downstairs, saying she needed to make some calls. John settled down in his armchair, content that soon everything would be back to- well, if not normal, then at least not as crazy as they had been the week prior.

 

A week after snapping at the two other people in his building, John was relaxed and calm, comfortably situated in their new tub with his lanky boyfriend.

“So this was your plan all along then?” he said eventually.

“It certainly was,” replied Sherlock smugly.

“And why, exactly?” John asked.

“Because I wanted to take a proper bath with you, and my legs wouldn’t fit in the other one,” Sherlock said, as though the answer were perfectly obvious.

“Yes but why?” John pressed.

“Because John,” Sherlock answered, and the look on his face made John want to either kiss him soundly or smother him in his sleep, “bathwater is gay.”

**Author's Note:**

> The idea for this is 100% because of the promo photo and the resultant furor of "WATER IS GAY AND HOW DID WE MISS THAT". Rebs was...influential...in that discussion. Go check out xer tumblr at gaybees.co.vu or xer incredible YouTube series TJLC Explained for incredible analyses and fun times!!
> 
> Also I'm really really sorry for the last line. That was the whole point of the fic, and it kinda...got away from me.


End file.
